“Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonest.”- Titus 2:3-5
If you read my blog post, “Cultivating Friendship,” then you may remember where I challenged myself and my readers to go out and find another mommy friend. I’m happy to say my challenge couldn’t have come at a better time.
Last Saturday, I had breakfast with a dear friend from church. I first met Michele at a Memorial Day picnic, but it was my Mother-in-law who connected their family with ours.
Michele has been married to her husband for 16 years and has four children. Her kids are older than my daughter, but I knew I wanted to connect with a veteran mom who’s been where I am now.
I remember waking up that Saturday morning with excitement. I couldn’t remember the last time I met a friend for a meal. I would love to say I went went to breakfast dressed nice from head-to-toe. Instead, I wore a hoodie and yoga pants. That’s the mommy fashion anyway, right? I knew Michele wouldn’t mind.
Michele and I met at Bob Evan’s for breakfast. I had never been there before so I wanted to try it out. It was amazing! An upgrade from IHOP. When arrived, Michele was already there with a table. I was so thankful because I had yet to have my morning cup of coffee. The days I try to function without it seem like a mess.
Michele and I began to talk about our week. I remember it being a stressful week for me at work and home. Then, Michele began to tell me about her week. We were so in depth in conversation, the waitress approached our table several times to take our order.
During the time we placed our breakfast order and got our food, we were learning a lot more about one another. This was the first time Michele and I had a one-on-one conversation. I told her about my family and she told me more about hers. We went from talking about things we liked to how both of our husbands love Dr. Pepper. I even discovered we have a similar passion for the show, “Fixer Upper.” The more we talked the I began to realize how much we had in common. It was refreshing to not only connect with another mom, but one that has similar tastes. As time passed, our conversations became more in depth. It was as if we had known each other for years. By the time my plate was empty we were on the topic of how overwhelming motherhood can be. We were not complaining about it by any means, just opening up about those difficult moments. For me, I explained how I felt like a failure that week because my husband had to feed Aurora formula. Until then, she was strictly breastmilk fed. I was struggling with production, but still felt like it was my fault.
As we were gathering our things to leave, I remember telling Michele why I asked her to breakfast. I explained my struggles finding other mommy friends. I was a little nervous to say those words out loud because I felt embarrassed. Michele replied that she was dealing with something similar when she first moved to the area as well. She went on to suggest we do something like this once a month. That’s when I learned Michele wanted to get out of the house more herself. That was a wake-up call.
By asking Michele to breakfast I was thinking it would be more for me than her. She’s been a mom longer than me and has other friends so I felt honored that she gave up her time on a Saturday morning. However, I realized that she needed those few hours of mommy friend time just as much as me.
It goes to show that no matter how long you’ve been a mother or what season you’re in, time with other moms is needed.
Did you take my challenge? How did it feel to connect with another mom? Are you making it a monthly or weekly thing? I hope you were able to feel the relief when connecting with your new mommy friend. Here is my next challenge.
First, go re-read the verse I included at the beginning of this blog post. Titus 2:3-5. Let the words sink in for a few seconds. Then, I want you to write down at least 5 moms that you know. They can be older than you, younger, a sibling or friend. I challenge you to connect with them throughout the week. It can be a quick text message or Facebook message. I encourage you to ask how things are going in their life, ask them how you can pray for them that day or throughout the week, and send them an uplifting message or scripture.
Maybe you can go a step further and meet them for coffee or FaceTime for 15 minutes this week. As you go throughout your week, remember to pray for them. Even if you don’t know what to pray about. As the week goes by, you’ll be able to see how God is working through you to reach other moms. You may even see how God is working in your life as well.
Feel free to share this post with other moms. I would love see a week where mothers encourage each other versus comparing or judging one another. Once you’ve completed the challenge, post your experiences in the comment section below. You never know what mother you will encourage to make a difference.